Wednesday, 19 October 2011

We're Engaged!

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 Two are better than one because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. 

There is nothing more surreal, than having the man you love asking you to spend the rest of your life with him. Its a combination of shock, joy, fear, elation & hope. The shock is from pure disbelief that I am loved enough by this incredible person for him to actually want to marry me. The joy of knowing that I get to spend the rest of my life getting to know him, enjoying his company & growing in our friendship. The fear of failing him...which is inevitable. And the hope that this moment is as special for him, as it is for me. God has given me many, many wonderful gifts. God has provided me with so much. But aside from my salvation, never, have I felt as overwhelmed with gratitude to God as I did the moment Jonny proposed to me. I was humbled to know that despite my inadequacies, despite my selfishness and shortfalls - despite all the ugliness in my heart, that God still loves me enough to bless me with this wonderful gift of a man, and Jonny still loves me enough to want to love me more, and for longer! With every new stage of life, comes the question 'surely I am not ready for this??'- I asked this question when I left school, left home, left my country, began working in ministry, and when I became engaged. When I think about it I realize I was not ready for any of those things. We never are really. Deep down I still feel like a 12 year old girl who has no idea what she is doing. But God gives me what I need to handle each new day, He equips me for each journey. He gives me more than I could ever hope for. Strength, patience, courage, love....he is a generous God.